CHAPTER 2- It's called Prozac

DISCLAIMER:  Rurouni Kenshin, all the characters and the story are property of Nobuhiro Watsuki, Jump Comics, etc. etc…  I'm just a poor college art student and not even worth suing. I do this cause I'm CRAZY and I love the show!!!  Enjoy!
 

" SAITO! PUT THAT CIGARETTE OUT!"  Kaoru leaned from her seat, giving him her worst dagger-eyed glare.
 Saito ignored her as usual.
 " Kenshin-- how can you stand it!?  Make him stop!" Kaoru turned to Kenshin in vehement protest.  Kenshin saw the death look she gave him and coughed slightly, rising from his seat.
 " Saito, I think it's best to do what Kaoru-dono asks or…." He trailed off.
 " Or?" Saito looked at him, blowing smoke in their faces.
" Orrr---" Kenshin glanced at Raya who was busily chattering with a very tired looking Soujirou. "Or, we'll ask Raya-dono to make you."
 " Nani?" Raya heard her name and looked up at Kenshin.
 " Raya?" Saito raised one eyebrow and looked at her.  She shivered from the icy stare he gave her, turned chibi and crawled into Soujirou's Gi.
" Soujirou! Protect me from this madman!!!!!"
 Kenshin gave a huge sweatdrop.  Kaoru stood up and leaned over the back of her chair annoyed.
 " HAVE A BACKBONE!! GEEZ!!  YOU'RE THE AUTHOR AREN'T YOU!?"
 " I know--.." Chibi Raya whimpered, looking out from the opening of the Gi. "But… when it comes to Saito, I get all shaky inside… I can't help it!  He's scary!"
 The tension in the air broke as Soujirou burst out laughing.
 " HUH? WHAT'S SO FUNNY?" Kaoru turned on him angrily.
 " HA HA HA!! It's just--" Soujirou tried to stifle his laughter. " I can't help it! I'm ticklish!!! HA HA!!"
 Chibi Raya got an evil thought. " Like, here?" She tickled his side.  Soujirou doubled over laughing.
 " Oh gods…" Kaoru rolled her eyes.  " I don't mind if you tickle him, but keep this parody clean!"
 Raya jumped out of his Gi and turned normal, instantly serious. "WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN!!"
 " YOU'RE A DAMN PERVERT!"
 Raya opened her mouth to retort, but then her angry glare was replaced with a sly, catty grin. " Ohhhh-- you said to keep the parody "clean" huh?"
 Kaoru blinked. " Yeah--"
 " Too bad-- " Raya shook her head.  " And I was going to make a steamy hot love scene between you and Kenshin in first class while everyone else was asleep-- but since you want it to be "clean" I guess I can't do it anymore-- Darn it…"
 Kaoru's mouth dropped open.  Kenshin's eyes bugged out.
 " Oro--"
 " Ah hahaha--" Kaoru put her hand behind her head and smiled at Raya apologetically. " Did I say keep it clean?  Well-- you misunderstood… I didn't mean clean in THAT way-- I meant…"
 " Nani?  You called me a pervert…"
 Kaoru wished that the earth would open up and swallow her whole, unfortunately, the earth was 15,000 feet below them.
 " I'm-- sorry?" She said hopefully.
 " You're not really sorry, you just want that steamy love scene!"
 " OK! I'm VERY sorry…" Kaoru was getting physically more and more irritated.
 " Too late, You called me a pervert!"
 " WHY YOU--" Kaoru jumped for Raya's throat.
 " Kaoru-dono!" Kenshin pulled her back.  Kaoru struggled out of his arms and looked at him angrily.
 " Kenshin!  Why'd you do that!?" she leaned into him, whispering in his ear. "Don't tell me you DON’T want a steamy love scene?"  Her eyes got all wide and watery.  Kenshin gave her a goofy smile and waved one hand.
 " Well-- that's not what I meant… I don’t think attacking Raya-dono is going to make such a thing happen…"
  " Heh heh-- you better believe it…" Raya said with an evil smile.  Kaoru looked at her with dagger eyes.  Raya returned the hard stare.
 " Morons--" Saito muttered.
 They both turned on Saito angrily.
 " NANI?" They spoke in unison.  Raya stomped into the isle along with Kaoru and they hovered over him.  Saito didn't even flinch.
 " Watch out man, Raya can be twice as violent as Kaoru when she gets pissed…" Yahiko muttered.
 Saito took the cigarette from his mouth and smiled evilly.  " I thought she was scared of me."
 " That was JUST an excuse to crawl into Soujirou's Gi" ( I've always wanted to do that! Oh hohoho)
 Soujirou blushed slightly.
 " And stop smoking that dreadful thing!" Kaoru took the cigarette from his hand and extinguished it in the ashtray."
 Saito's eyes instantly narrowed.
 " Don't even think about it." Raya said angrily.  " I'll write you out of this parody! I swear I will!"
 Saito said nothing, only looked away.  The two girls exchanged glances and then grinned at the other.
 " ALL RIGHT!"  Kaoru high-fived Raya.  " THE GIRLS WIN!"
 " And two seconds ago they were about to rip each other's heads off…" Kenshin muttered, looking perplexed at the two new best friends.
 " I don't get women…" Yahiko muttered.
 " Screw that dumb Saito-- with Raya-san on our side, there's no way he can get his way!"  Kaoru grinned and then grabbed Raya by the arm and pulled her into the next cabin away from the group. " Now-- about that love scene…"
 " Huh? I wonder where they're going?" Yahiko looked back momentarily, then shrugged and put on some earphones.

****

Kaoru stood talking with Raya for a long time, Raya's face grew redder and redder until it could be compared with a ripe tomato.
" Did you get all that?"  Kaoru grinned evilly and rubbed her hands together in anticipation.  Raya looked at her open mouthed.
 " Jeez…. I thought you were supposed to be all "innocent" and "pure!"  I never thought you knew about THAT sort of stuff!"
 Kaoru rolled her eyes. " Oh… Tae-san can be VERY informative about such things.  I'm not the country bumpkin you imagine me to be."  She quickly grabbed Raya by her shirt collar and looked into her eyes entreatingly. "WELL? Will you? PLEASE!"
 Raya gave a HUGE sweatdrop… " Well---"
 " I'll do ANYTHING! I WANT THE LOVE SCENE!"
 " Datte…"
 
 Kenshin glanced back at the two girls conversing in low voices and gave a large sweatdrop as Kaoru got on her hands and knees and bowed before Raya, who's face had turned a bright shade of red.
 " You'd better run while you can Himura-san." Soujirou said.  " Raya-san looks like she's bending to Kaoru-san."
 Kenshin blinked back at him. " Where can I run to?"
 
 **** back with Raya and Kaoru***

 " PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!" Kaoru got on her hands and knees and bowed before Raya.
 " Oh OK! I will! You happy now?"
 "THANK YOU!"  Kaoru looked up at her with a wide grin, her eyes sparkled.  Raya sighed heavily.
 " Yeah yeah… wait until everyone else is sleeping though, we have a while yet."
 Kaoru began to stand when a looming shadow suddenly hovered over her.  Raya gasped and Kaoru turned around to see Enishi holding his sword above her head, ready to strike down at Kaoru.
 " HA! GRIEVE BATTOUSAI! MY JINCHUU WILL BE COMPLETE!!!"
 He was about to strike when Tomoe ran in front of him.  Enishi stopped his sword within a hairs breadth of her exposed back.
 " DAMN IT TOMOE! Why do you always have to run in front of people's swords like that!?  It's the second time today!"
 Tomoe turned around to look at him with a depressed air.
 " I want to die."
 " Damn it-- WHY won't you see a therapist!?"
 " I want to die…"
 " STOP SAYING THAT!"
 " Fine then…  I want to be put out of my misery."
 Kaoru and Raya both stood while the siblings bickered back and forth.
" It's called PROZAC!"  Enishi yelled.
" I hate my life!"
Raya leaned over and whispered in Kaoru's ear.
 " She's not very optimistic, is she?" She asked Kaoru.
 Kaoru shook her head and snuck back into their cabin of the plane.  " She wasn't always like that, but when Watsuki gave her such a depressing life, it affected her real life.  She's lost it…  she thinks she should really be dead and so is always trying to kill herself."
 " Jeez-- I didn't know dying could affect someone like that."
 " Well-- it's not a pleasant experience."
 " Yeah I bet!  I was depressed for a week before I figured out you were alive!"
 " Ahhh-- I'm touched!"
 " Yeah--" Raya laughed evilly " I can't wait until you find out what I'll do to Gein in the chapters to come.  Oh hohoho---  He won't know what hit him!"
 Saito was listening into his conversation and stood up, towering over Raya and Kaoru.  He grabbed Raya by the wrist and handcuffed her.
 " ?! SAITO! What are you doing?" Raya yelled.
 " Vengeance is illegal by Meiji law-- I'm placing you under arrest."
 " But- I DIDN'T do anything!"
 " Saito you tight ass!  Lighten up!"  Kaoru looked at him indignantly.  Saito flashed her a cold look.
 " Stay out of this raccoon girl, or I'll arrest you too as co-conspirator."
 " GRR--- I'll KILL you!"  Kaoru threw a punch at him but he caught it and quickly put the other handcuff on her wrist.  Attaching her to Raya.  Both girls looked at him shocked.
 " You're SO dumb! We're on an airplane! You can't arrest us!"  Screeched Raya.
 " Yeah!  WHAT are you going to do? It's not like there are any bars to throw us behind!"
 Saito gave them an evil smile and began dragging them over to the back of the plane. " Enishi will be happy to watch you both until we get off the plane."
 " AHHH!! KENSHIN!" Kaoru screamed.
 " SOUJIROU!! HELP ME!"  Raya screamed.
 Everyone but Sano (for he was still fast asleep) and Aoshi (for he could have cared less) had watched the scene with open mouths. Kenshin blinked twice and then jumped up, grabbing his yellow and orange tagged bag.  Soujirou joined him and both males tried to run after him through the isles.
 " KAORU-DONO! I'M COMING!"
 " RAYA-SAN! HOLD ON! ACK!"  Soujirou fell smack on his face as Kenshin stepped on his Hakama.  Kenshin tripped over Soujirou and they both fell in a pile on the narrow isle.
 " ACK! Himura-san! Please get off me! I have to save Raya-san!"
 " Gomen-nasai Soujirou!  But… these stupid isles are so hard to move fast in!"
 " AHHHH!!!  KENSHIN! SOUJIROU!"  Raya's screaming can be heard at the back of the plane.  Enishi's maniacle laughter following.
 " DIE AUTHOR OF THIS FIC!!"
 " AHHHH!!!  WHAT DID I DO TO YOU?!"

 Meanwhile-- you've probably been wondering what Hiko and Misao and Megumi have been up to?  Well, Hiko had his laptop out and was typing away vigorously on his new book ( all about himself of course). It's title is... " Chronicles of a Hiten Mitsurugu Ryuu  Master."  Misao was busy trying to make Aoshi smile by telling REALLY bad jokes.
 " Aoshi-sama, How many Kenshin character's does it take to screw in a light bulb?"
 " …"
 " Give up?  5!  Kaoru and Yahiko to fight and break the old lightbulb and make Kenshin fix it.  But Kenshin doesn't know what a lightbulb is so we need Hiko to explain it's principles to him in order to fix it.  And then we need Sano because he's the only one tall enough to reach!"
 "…"
 Megumi, meanwhile was bent over a crossword puzzle.  She chewed on the end of her pencil as she racked her brains.
 " Hmmmm… what's a 4 letter word for stupid?"
 Raya's voice carried over. " BAKA! SOUJIROU NO BAKA! SAVE ME FROM THIS LUNATIC!"
 " Baka! That's it!"  Megumi laughed and filled in the word.
 Soujirou and Kenshin both  managed to untangle themselves and struggled up.  They rushed again towards the back of the plane.  Suddenly a loud bell made them stop in their tracks.  The Stewardesses voice could be heard over the loudspeaker.

 " The captain has just turned on the fasten seatbelt sign, please return to your seats as we will be experiencing some air turbulence."

 Kenshin looked at Soujirou and they shrugged to each other and began walking back to their seats.
 " KENSHIN! WHERE ARE YOU?!" Kaoru's voice could be heard. " SAVE ME NOW!"
 " GOMEN KAORU-DONO! WE HAVE TO PUT ON OUR SEATBELTS!" Kenshin called back to her.
 " WHAT THE @#%!^  I'LL KILL YOU IF YOU DON'T COME AND SAVE ME!" Kaoru screamed.
 " SIT TIGHT RAYA-SAN!" Soujirou called. " We'll come when the air turbulence has stopped."
 The two men sat back in their seats and fastened their seatbelts.  Saito showed up a moment later and sat back in his seat next to Yahiko.  Yahiko had turned the sound on his walkman to full blast in order to drown out the screams of the two hysterical females.
 " DAMN IT KENSHIN! SOUJIROU!" Both of their voices carried through the plane.  Kenshin offered Soujirou some ear plugs, which he accepted gratefully."